Caveat Emptor - Do you REALLY want an MBA?

Full disclosure. It is May 7, 2010. I graduate from a two-year MBA program at a Top 50 business school in the northeast in 8 days' time.

I have no job.

So there you have it - from here on out, please keep this in mind. I don't necessarily feel bitter towards my MBA, but I find it important to fully re-think why I chose to do this program. Was my job all that bad? At the time I felt firmly the answer was "hell yes"...now, I'm not so sure - paychecks are paychecks after all.

So, let's take a look back at the myths of the MBA as a point to consider before you invest somewhere in between one and seven years and anywhere between $10,000 to $100,000 (not to mention opportunity cost of lost wages) in a program.

1) An MBA will get you a higher-level job

No. It won't. Believe me. It really won't.

YOU will get yourself a higher-level job. You will accomplish this through good work, good references, and possibly jumping to a higher-level position at another company.

Getting an MBA categorically does not make the world magically believe you are suddenly qualified to run management jobs in any field you like - this I can promise you. MAYBE in times of economic boom companies will allow you to proxy your MBA work as viable management experience. But in this current climate, not a chance. If you had great management experience prior to entering the MBA program, then the MBA will give you a slight leg up over your competition. If you didn't have great management experience prior to entering the program, let me tell you what's going to happen:

You are going to work a similar near-entry level position to what you were already doing, except you're going to have student debts to pay off now. Your payoff for the MBA program will not be seen immediately, so be ready for some humbling.

So what if your company has a higher position and they want an MBA for it? See if they'll let you do it part-time and work your way through the program - chances are your company will fund it if they're so damn desperate for an MBA.

2) MBA's Are Changing to Give You Real Life Management Experience (related to Myth #1)

No. They don't. They give you a simulation of real life project management and consulting. And I assure you that employers note the difference here. Don't fool yourself for one second when you read the programs' brochures. Real life management experience happens in real life when, significantly, you can get fired when you fuck up.

Ok, so we've addressed those myths.

Why, then, would you get an MBA? Let's look at the possible arguments and then consider if they're viable.

1) You get lots of accounting and financial experience

Yes, true. Of course, you could've just taken a couple accounting and finance classes. Or if you're driven enough, from a book.

2) You get lots of networking opportunities and access to an alumni network

Yes, this is absolutely true, and is wonderfully helpful. This is a great point and I do not dream of refuting it.

3) You want to start your own business and need tools and credentials to do it

Partially true. Some book understanding of business plans, financial projections, and whatnot is good for this, as is having experienced professors who can guide you through your initial business plan drafts.

But for pitching to VC's or Angels? They want to see grey hairs and battle scars. More important than your MBA is your finding a team of experienced pros who can guide your innovative butt to profitability. Can you leverage #2 to achieve #3? You bet. Are there other ways to do it? You bet.

4) You are unhappy with your job and are seeking a change

Let me put it bluntly:

AT LEAST YOU HAVE A JOB

This is the worst reason ever to enter an MBA program. You are blindly throwing away lots of money to address an intangible restlessness you are feeling. Maybe you got screwed over for a promotion, or you don't particularly like working in your family business, or what have you. There are other ways to break out of that rut that don't cost you what an MBA costs. Relax, breathe, do some charity work, and get some perspective before you charge into MBA applications.

So the networking, the alumni network, and the mild career boost the MBA can give you are the reasons you might want to pursue an MBA.

These are valid enough reasons, don't get me wrong. But make sure you understand this - it is not going to bring about a dramatic change to your career. That is something that comes from you - from your networking, from your pounding pavements to find new opportunities, and from your continual learning through meetings, articles, interviews, and what have you.

The MBA program is difficult, frustrating, tiring. You will be continually exhausted, irritable, and depressed. Make sure you really want this before you apply or start. You may find your time, money, and sanity are better spent elsewhere with far greater return for your life and career.